WESTLAKE, LA 8-8-2017

“Rob?  Why do people live here?”

“Lin?  Why do people drive their motorhomes here?” 

I know you should never answer a question with a question, but in this case, both questions are valid.  I’d say it’s raining but individual raindrops normally have air between them, don’t they?  Presently, there is no air between the raindrops. What we have is a sheet of water.  Or maybe a block of water.  And it comes with sound:  lightning followed every 11 seconds by thunder.  (I counted.)  “Rob, do motorhomes float?”  The National Weather Service has sent 6 severe storm warnings to my phone, so far.  Aren’t they special?  As if I didn’t know.  “Avoid flash flood areas.”  OK, and we should go where to accomplish this avoidance, then?  Nevada sounds good.  We planned this trip in February, 2016.  Did God have these floods in mind way back then?  He could have told us.  Speaking of avoidance, the sign said, “Avoid West Nile virus.  Wear insect repellent containing DEET when going outdoors.”

We need to put some “comfort food” on the menu.  Root beer float?  Watermelon?  Sea cucumbers?  Ocean Spray juice?  Turtle soup?  Lifesavers?  We are hunkered down, watching it storm in Westlake (with the emphasis on “lake”).  We haven’t often seen frogs surfing in a parking lot.  In spite of the drenching, we have accomplished a couple of tasks:  sealed a roof leak around the TV dish and sealed off a damaged wheel well liner (a casualty of a previous blowout) where water from the tires was being catapulted up under the frig and into the cabin.  Two-six-pack-jobs, Rob said, but we finished them in two beers each.

This portrait, father and son,
will be a collector, someday.

On a more fun note:  about the Presidential limousine at HW’s library.  The plaque says that most of the details regarding the limo are classified but the public may know a few things.  The Secret Service oversees all of the servicing of the vehicles.  Stay away!  The windows are thick as a telephone book.  They do not specify if the telephone book is from Los Angeles or Pahrump.  The tires are bullet-proof.  If they are shot at, inserts in the tires allow the limo to keep moving along.  The limo has a remote starter with a bomb detector, a self-healing fuel tank, a supplemental supply of oxygen and layers of Kevlar under the car’s sheet metal from top to bottom.  The limo weighs about 7,000 pounds.  Also, it hits zero to sixty in 4.3 seconds.  (I made that last part up.)  There are 12 limos, all stored below the Secret Service offices and under 24/7 surveillance.  I don’t know if they come with a tow package or USB ports.

A fun little swamp, don't you think?

Back to the present.  We are trying to outrun a nor’easter that is a yellow and red spot on the weather map (not a good sign).  Driving visibility is near zero.  We should arrive in New Orleans in about 3 hours, God willing and the creeks don’t rise, literally.  Along the way, a bridge, miles long, crosses over the Henderson Swamp.  Endless miles of green, slimy, nasty swamps with green shit growing everywhere.  I wonder if alligators are in there.  I “wonder,” I’m not going to try to find out! 

The sign read, "No anchoring or dredging."  A good
place to dump the body!

I asked a few questions of Larry, the proprietor of our last park:

“What are those towers I see everywhere, Larry?  The ones with the white strobes on top?”

“Those are cell towers.”

“Cell towers?  Why are there strobes on them?”

“To alert aircraft to their presence.”

“Aircraft?!  They fly that low?!”

“Well, yes.  The crop dusters do.”

“Crop dusters?  Here in the middle of town?”

“Yeah.  The ones that fly over the swamps to keep the mosquitoes down.”

……..

“Rob?  Why do people live here?”