12-15-2015 FRANKFURT, GERMANY

We were in a bit of a hurry to get to Frankfurt where our car was due to be dropped off by 3PM.  But not so much in a hurry that we couldn’t drive the squiggly back roads for a time.  On a map, this road looks like the convolutions of a brain and Rob was in Heaven driving it. 

Tiny road to Frankfurt

We passed through many tiny villages with very narrow roads sometimes not much wider than a driveway and in the fields, perfect and laid out with a t-square, the occasional shrine requesting God’s blessings and protection.  This is the pretty part of the trip, far more so than screaming along the autobahn at ~110 mph being passed by others screaming faster.

On the tiny winding road to Frankfurt

Upon arrival in Frankfurt, we found it to be a mix of antiquity and big, modern, windy city.  Our hotel was about ½ block from the Christmas market so we dropped the car off when we arrived and our feet were our final transportation for two days.  Maybe the cities and villages compete for first place in the spectacular department when it comes to the Christmas markets.  Frankfurt’s would certainly rank way up there.  First, there is a tree in the middle of the square that we estimate to be 150 feet tall and it is decorated with lights and ornaments all the way to the top.  Would it be fun to ride that cherry-picker or what?! 

Giant tree at the
Christmas Market

One last time, we spent some hours weaving in, out and around the beautifully-decorated booths in the cold and occasional rain. 

Mr. Tree

This time, we were lucky to find enclosed, warm booths that were set up like saloons with long tables and seats!  Rob had his first pizza in weeks but done German-style, “flammkuchen,” with a cracker thin crust, white sauce, special cheese and vegetables.  About the cheese:  we asked about it and Hanka described it as “Französches emantaler mix,” a secret private recipe that the chef would not divulge! 

Rob gets a pizza fix
(flammkuchen) 

She offered me a bowl of the cubes marinating with, she turned the spoon a bit for me to see, a snail in it!  I wanted to try it but a whole bowl, maybe a pound, of cheese was a bit too much.  I pointed at my fluffy middle and Hanka cried, “Nein, nein, NEIN!  Not too much!  It’s Winter!  ACH!”  She walked away shaking her head.

We took a ride around town on the tour bus to learn a bit of the history.  When Charlemagne was engaged in battle and his troops were backed into a corner at river’s edge (the Main), he looked out to the water and saw a doe and her fawn crossing.  He then realized it was shallow enough to wade across and so his troops escaped capture, crossed the river and set up a “fort of the Franks,” which over time evolved into the city’s name, Frankfurt.  Closer to home, in 1938, a year when the Nazis were on a mission to destroy every Hebrew molecule on the planet, the synagogue here was destroyed by fire in similar fashion as in other cities we have visited.  Nevertheless, the synagogue was restored, the Jewish people returned and there is a community of roughly 7,000 now living in Frankfurt.  And also, maybe, in peace.  Even closer to home, moored at the river’s edge was the River Queen, the boat we sailed on 2009 from Amsterdam to Budapest! 

MS River Queen on the Main!

Wow, cool!  “Hey Rob, I can see our room from here!”

This morning, a taxi carried us to Frankfurt airport at 6:30 AM.  After many days of little sleep in strange beds and noisy rooms with sirens and boy racers on the streets, the chimes of the church bells every 15 minutes starting at 4AM, in and out of the suitcase, we are very tired.  Maybe when we arrive home we will sleep for 24 hours.  Then, it will be time to (wait for it) get into Christmas!  Das ist alles, für jetzt.  Frohe Weihnachten mit liebe!

Merry Christmas with love!

12-13-2015 ROTHENBURG OB DER TAUBER, GERMANY

Suzy-Q, the lady inside our GPS, took us directly, with just a little confusion on both her part and ours, through the farm country to our next little hotel.  Rob did a good job of navigating the tiny cobblestone lane, about a foot wider than the car on either side.  The Hotel Reichsküchenmeister is inside the wall near the center of town.  Not a single crabby Kraut is employed here.  The staff is beyond gracious.  What a view from our beautiful second floor room, through a double set of windows made up of small panes framed in wood. 

View from our window

Between them is our “refrigerator” for sundries such as wine and cheese.  Before long we were settled in and, after checking the documents and play money supply we routinely carry, it was time to go walk the glittery Christmas lanes.  (I keep my “pretend money” in a ziplock.  Classy, hey?)  There are decorations everywhere:  thousands of Christmas lights, trees, boughs, ribbons and ornaments as far as the eye can see. 

Rothenburg Christmas Market

Marketplace flanked by ancient buildings

Röthenburg (“Red Fortress”) is an ancient city dating back to the 11^th century and is still hugged by its original 3-foot thick walls. I am not sure from who the walls protected the burg, probably many different invading armies over the centuries.  One army that did not attack Röthenburg was the Allies during WWII.  The city was recognized as an ancient treasure and although everything outside the walls was obliterated, Röthenburg went unscathed, in like manner as other monuments such as the centuries-old Cologne Cathedral. 

Cologne Cathedral surrounded by rubble (note the bridge)

Lindy at the wall around
Rothenburg

Wall thickness measured in Rob-arms

In the center of town is the Church of St. Jakobus (St. James) and around it are beautiful half-timber buildings with tall gables and crooked shutters.  At the top of the Ratstrinkstube, the councilors’ tavern, animated figures depict a particular scenario from the 1600s.  In a confrontation with enemy forces led by General Tilly, Mayor Georg Nusch and he reached an agreement. 

Typical half-timber building.  This one is a pharmacy.

My favorite store:  Kathe Wohlfahrt's
Christmas Market

If Mayor Nusch could drink 3 ½ liters of wine in one minute, he would save his town from being pillaged.  Well, being the hero that he is, he chugged all of it and saved his town.  What a giver.  (No one says how the Mayor felt the next morning.)

There is a museum here that features medieval torture implements.  Somehow, a tour through this place didn’t seem to fit the spirit of The Season.  One device I know of was a cage built of bars.  A person was locked in this cage and submerged in the river until near-death (if he was lucky, I guess).  An infraction that justified this torture, as an example, was if a bread maker sold a one-pound loaf of bread that didn’t quite weigh one pound or a dozen rolls that was below the prescribed weight.  It became common practice for him to throw an extra roll in the bag, just to be on the safe side.  Thus was born the expression, “a baker’s dozen,” thirteen. 

If Rob is on a quest to find the perfect wienerschnitzel, I am on one to find the perfect leberknödel.  Rob may achieve his dream but I probably will not, because I already know where the perfect leberknödel was:  my Mom’s kitchen.  Everybody else tries hard.  Fortunately, the recipe is still alive and well in the family recipe collection!

Could this be the
perfect wienerschnitzel?

Shall we discuss Yurrupean showers?  Oh forget it.  Suffice it to say that there is a drain in the middle of every bathroom floor for a reason.

Frohe Weihnachten vom
Rothenburg ob der Tauber!

12-11-2015 MUNCHEN, GERMANY PART III

The Marienplatz is the center of the Christmas markets and it spreads out on the streets from there like the spokes of a wheel.  The Marienplatz is a huge plaza bordered on one side by a colossal structure called the Neues Rathaus, that is the “New Town Hall.” 

Neues Rathaus (aka Congress)

It is so massive and ornate that, at first blush, you would think it were a cathedral, not a government building.  And if this is the “new” one, built in the 1500s, what in the world could the “old” one look like?  Rob and I thought it was fitting, though, to call a building where politicians work a “Rat House.”  This building houses a huge glockenspiel with larger-than-life figures that twirl and dance to the music and the bells.  It doesn’t function every hour because it is old and fragile but we were lucky to arrive on the platz just as it began to play.  Thousands of people were stopped in their tracks, staring up in awe at the tower.

The glockenspiel

The Christmas markets are amazing.  They are created of booths made of wood, detailed and decorated with garland, trees, ornaments and lights.  (Where do they store this stuff for the other 49 weeks/year?)  Mile after mile you can stroll and admire the arts and crafts, all made carefully by artisans here in Germany.  You will not find “Made in China” labels here.  The organ grinders play carols and the bells in the towers peal.  The one thing you cannot do under any circumstance is sit down.  When you go to the Christmas Market, order food, have a glüwein, whatever it is you wish to do, you do it standing up.  There is no place, NO WHERE, to sit down.  At the end of a cold day walking on the cobblestones, it becomes time to find a warm place to plop down.  Which is where the gasthaus comes in handy.  We came upon the Andechser am Dom and decided to have a little bite for lunch.  Some friendly Krauts invited us to join their table and we were really glad.  It was cozy and the folks were smiling and happy.  Christmas time does that to people!  One lady was eating tartar and I was intrigued so I asked her about it and we all began to chat.  She was the most outgoing of the group and when Rob asked about the walleye on the menu, she cried, “Eeeeeew!  Ach, NEIN!  No fisch!  Ugh!  This is a bräuhaus!” 

"Nein, no fisch!" she said!

They wretched and we laughed.  We came back here for dinner and Rob ate (wait for it) schnitzel while I savored the tartar.   The locals are usually right.

At the Andechser am Dom

The Andechser am Dom - Yes, they eat
outside!  They think it's Summer!

We wandered home after dinner in the evening and all the Christmas markets were ablaze with Christmas lights and buzzing with activity under the watchful eye of the beautiful Neues Rathaus.  It was a happy day for us.

Marienplatz, Neues Rathaus
and Christkindlmarkt

Marienplatz Christkindlmarkt

The next morning, we arose and packed up.  Our next stop is Röthenburg and we took the back roads through the countryside to get there.  In a small town, Höchstädt an der Donau,

Hochstadt Palace in Hochstadt an der Donau

just around the bend a huge castle suddenly appeared.  It was built by Count Philipp Ludwig in 1574 for his new bride, Anna, the Duke’s daughter.  Thirteen years later, she was widowed and lived in the castle alone for 17 more years.  Now, the courtyard inside the castle is used for concerts, events and as a café/biergarten.  Continuing along the road, in Nördlingen, the locals sent us to the Red Ochsen Gasthof.  It is a tiny little room where an old fellow and his wife are the cooks and today’s fare is written on a blackboard.  We sat down at the old wooden table with a pretty little tablecloth in the middle and pillows on the chairs.  Rob chose rind goulash with spätzle and gravy and my lunch was a big bowl of suppe containing vegetables, many kinds of meat cut in tiny pieces and maultaschen (little raviolis containing meat and vegetables).  Like everything else we’ve had the pleasure to eat, the food prepared here was delicious.

I don’t know about the Krauts.  They’re petty gruff and impatient.  If the shortest distance between points A and B is where you are standing, you’ll be run over as if you are invisible.  We stepped into an antique shop in München and a crabby old Kraut asked for what we were looking.  We explained that we were just looking around.  He waved his arms and yelled, “This isn’t a museum!  I have to pay rent for this store in this building!  Do you want to buy something or not?!”  OK, auf wiedersehn, Herr Scheisskopf!  I’d like to find a wine glass like my Mom’s favorite glass but one thing is for certain:  if that crabby old bastard did have one in his store, he still does.

12-11-2015 MUNCHEN, GERMANY PART II

Our first whole day in München was ridiculous.  It was cold enough to freeze the nuts off a plow and raining.  I’m not a big fan of being cold.  Am I going to go out in this and wander around on the streets to look at strings of Christmas tree lights?  Already struggling with a cold?  I think not.  The least it could do is snow!

Rob suggested that we spend the day indoors.  Good idea.  We rode the sightseeing hop-on-hop-off bus to get an overview of the city.  It was so cold that the windows, covered with raindrops, fogged up and we couldn’t see a thing.  The guide spoke German and a bit of English so we didn’t learn a whole lot.  The bus stopped at the Nymphenburg Palace and we were invited to get off and tour the grounds and buildings.  “We’ll pick you up later, another bus will be by.”  I don’t think so.  The Palace does have some interesting history, though, and on a better day, it would have been a spectacular sight with vast expanses of lawn and fountains all surrounded by palace buildings.  There were a lot of Ludwigs, Maximillians, Ferdinands and Marias involved in the history and they were all by rights blood lines of this and that making them very, very important.  The one thing I did get from the broken English on this tour is that this chick from Spain, Maria, married this guy from here and they kept trying to have a son so she promised God she would build a church if she could get pregnant.  (Apparently she thought getting pregnant involved a church.  Maybe because everybody yells, “Oh God!  Oh God!”)  I guess she figured it out because she got pregnant and gave birth to Maximillian who turned out to be one of the greatest Bavarian rulers ever.  His statue is all over town.  Maximillian Street.   Maximillian Square.  Maximillian stew.  Maximillian E-I-E-I-O!  We dig Max to the max!  And that’s all I know about that.

Rob at the Bimmer Museum

Magnesium chassis

As I mentioned, it was cold and rainy, so a museum made sense.  We continued on the bus to the BMW Museum, led there by Rob’s built-in GPS system that runs on petrol.  Interestingly, the company started out in 1917 with an airplane engine that they marketed to the Prussians during WWI.  It was a big success and the company name was changed to Bayerische Motoren Werke.  It wasn’t till the 1930s that they created motorcycle and auto engines and later, race cars.  One of the chassis on display is made of magnesium, very light-weight but hard to weld because it’s flammable.  The entire chassis weighs about 75 pounds.  (And bursts into flame on impact?  They don’t talk about that.)   The museum is state-of-the-art modern and sparkling clean and the exhibits are polished with q-tips until they glitter.  Quite impressive.

Bimmer Museum

Rob and the 3.0 CSL

We waited in the rain and, finally, frozen and wet, we boarded the bus for the rest of the city tour.  It took us past many a fountain, monument and arch but all I was thinking about was drying out and getting warm so I must confess that I don’t have much to tell you about the city highlights.  I know that I dreaded the walk back to the hotel. Luckily, the Hofbräuhaus stood in the way,

Ein Hofbrauhaus!

holding a table, keeping the food warm and the beer cold.  To my surprise, Rob had something other than schnitzel!  He ordered roulade of wild boar!  I ordered  Bavarian deer stew.  Because we could.  Both were very good, the warm food felt good inside and the music cheered our weary souls.  Next stop:  hotel room.  Which reminds me:  why do people like down pillows?  You lay your head on them and poof!  They collapse into nothing.

Band at the Hofbraushaus!
Ein, zwei, g'suffa!

12-9-2015 MUNCHEN, GERMANY

The drive to Munich from Ulm is short and frightfully fast on the autobahn so instead we decided to take the little back roads through the farm land and small villages.  The broad leaf trees are bare this time of year, huge clumps of mistletoe cling to the branches and the fields are either plowed under or covered with green velvet.  There were blinds scattered here and there, maybe for ducks or venison on the hoof?  Little villages of white houses with red roofs dot the landscape, always a kirche (church) as the centerpiece. 

Curiously, every now and then, there was what looked like a cemetery headstone with a cross on it out in the middle of a field.  I had to know what this is and so we stopped.  On this particular stone were the words, “Gott segne u schutze die Fluren Kreigsjahr 1940.”  I couldn’t find the words in my book and the hotelier here in Munich told me this is Old German.  It says, “God bless and protect our fields.  War Year 1940.” 

A quiet, thoughtful prayer engraved on this stone.  Did the farmers in the back country, without TV or internet, even know what the war was all about?  Maybe not.  Only that their fields might be bombed and they and their families would be left destroyed, hungry and in despair.  If this little monument could but talk.

We didn’t really know where we were in the little town of Krumbach but we came upon the Munding Gasthof and it was open.  It is a lovely white building with green shutters, family-owned for generations.  The small restaurant has wooden tables and benches where you are seated with others. 

Munding Gasthof, Krumbach, Germany

The benches have simple quilted pillows on them for a little added comfort.  Ladies in pretty dirndls serve food and I hit the jackpot!  Leberknödel soup was on the menu!  It tasted delicious, similar to Mom’s but with a lot more liver.  I’ll have to remember that.  Once again, Rob ate schnitzel with fries, what else?  As we were leaving, we encountered an Advent wreath.  I haven’t seen one since I was a child.  Four candles stand amid the boughs of the wreath to symbolize four weeks until Christmas and the arrival of the Christ child.  Each week, one more candle is lit and so on this day, there were two weeks left until Christmas.  In grade school, we all assembled for the lighting of the advent wreath each week as we sang “Oh Come, Emmanuel,” and it was sweet agony for us little kids.  “Three more weeks to wait, I can’t stand it.”  In the Munding Gasthof, how pretty and peaceful this wreath was and it brought back a flood of memories.  (Some good.  Some bad if the good Sisters of the Holy Family of Nazareth were having a pissy day.)

Advent wreath at Munding Gasthof

After lunch, we pressed on through the farm country to Schwabmünchen and soon we hit the autobahn for the Platzl Hotel in München.  This hotel is luxurious in the extreme with tuxedo-clad doormen, everybody calling me “Madame” and piles of down-doobie-do-down-down on the bed.  It is no accident, either, that it was chosen by us months ago based upon its location about ½ block from the Hofbräuhaus, the happiest oompah saloon in the world.  We got settled into our digs and, well, we had to go somewhere for dinner, didn’t we?  Around the corner to the Hofbräuhaus!  Stephan, Gottlieb and Karl invited us to join their long wooden table to laugh and sing.  Food and big steins of beer were ordered.  My dinner was schweinhaxe, a rotisserie-roasted pig hock about the size of a football, and a potato dumpling with gravy.  Rob had… wait for it… schnitzel with hot potato salad.  Prosit!  Ah, lots more time to spend in München!

PROSIT!

12-7-2015 ULM, GERMANY

It was easy to pick up a rental car in Basel, one tram stop away.  Rob went and picked up the Audi Q3 and I finished packing, we loaded up and hit the road.  We brought the GPS from home with Europe loaded into it and Suzy-Q (the lady inside the GPS) actually spoke English!  Rob did all the driving (cheaper for insurance) and he averaged about 75 mph.  When driving 100 mph, we were passed like a dirty shirt by Porsches, Bimmers and the occasional Ferrari.

Now, we are in Ulm/Neu-Ulm.  “Eu” in German is pronounced “oy.”  Neu-Ulm is “noy ulm.”  You don’t say the word “euros” like “you-rows.”  You say, “oy-rows.”  So we got that part straightened out.

Tired and travel-weary, Rob fixed up a couple of cocktails and we ordered dinner in the room.  Rob was fine with this.  Wienerschnitzel mit fries, are you kidding me?  I was just glad to stay in and stay warm and call it an early night.  I slept peacefully and smiled in my sleep sometimes when, just beyond the window, the church bells rang through the night, reminding me of past times when I stayed overnight at my Gramma’s.

Ulm Cathedral (Munster) from the
bridge across the Danube

I don’t know how Neu-Ulm differs from regular old Ulm.  Maybe it’s a suburb or a sister city.  The Münster Cathedral stands majestically in the center of Ulm.  (I thought “Münster, sometimes “Minster,” meant “Monster,” which it sure could, but it really means something like “monastery” or “church.”)  It has the highest spire in the world at 528 feet into the sky and on the ground, it is many blocks around the whole structure.  The construction began in 1377 and the spire was topped off in 1890.  Interestingly, the cathedral was originally Catholic but a Bishopric was never established so it isn’t really considered a cathedral.  In fact, the town of Ulm decided that they (and you) should be Lutheran so the religion practiced in the cathedral now is Lutheran.  The cathedral is a major human achievement.  Benevolent dictators that we are, the Allies obliterated 90% of everything else around the cathedral and didn’t touch a hair of the Münster itself.  Currently, the Krauts talk a lot about how the Allies bombed the shit out of this and that during WWII.  Hey, they started it.

The main event, the Ulmer Weinachtsmarkt, takes place in the courtyard of the Ulm Cathedral, a brief stroll on the bridge across the Danube from our hotel through narrow streets and past one of the oldest buildings ever.

Yup, narrow!

  It might actually fall into the river, eventually.

Crooked old hotel and restaurant

 The marketplace is so big that a map pointing out all the specialties is provided.  Immediately, we zeroed in on brats for breakfast and, boy oh boy, they are everywhere, of every type and spice imaginable and lengths to include hanging out of the bun by about six inches on each end. 

Ulmer Weinachtsmarkt under
the watchful eye of the Munster

Lindy & Rob at Ulmer
Weinachtsmarkt

Sides include spätzle mixed with cheese and garlic, German potato salad and sauerkraut.  These are my people!  (Well, to a degree.  They’re pretty liberal over here.  One of our tour guides on the boat said that Germany must help the refugees, saying “These poor people don’t even have iphones!”  Gosh!  In other news, Obama says the White House “has a plan” for defeating ISIS and “it’s working.”  I wonder if one of you can tell me what the plan is, please?  And tell him to hurry up!)

On to München this morning.  A short distance and so we are taking the back roads.  

12-5-2015 BASEL, SWITZERLAND

Filling in the blanks:

Twice we did not go ashore when docked.  We didn’t go to Baden-Baden.  Almost 3 hours on a bus seemed a lot in the pouring rain and cold.  We took a time out.  We also did not go to Breisach on the last day.  The “disembarkation briefing” had us in a kerfuffle so we thought it better to stay put and pack our bags.  That afternoon, Rob went, instead, for a brisk walk in the dense fog and cold and ran into an old fort built in 1319.  We don’t have much information on this fort but Rob took a few photos.

In the end, a taxi transported us from the River Harmony to the Dorint Hotel An der Messe in the morning.  After settling in, we decided to explore a bit.  Dorint is located handily on the tram lines and we have already figured out how to hop-on-hop-off to see what’s shakin’ in Switzerland.  Mostly, whatever is shakin’ is expensive and they charge for everything.  The two mile taxi ride was $20.  At the hotel, buffet breakfast is served.  $26/ea.  We requested ice in our room for cocktails.  $5 for ice cubes. If desired, a bottle of chardonnay can be delivered to the room for $70 + $5 delivery charge.  Big Mac and a medium fries $13.  Martini in a bar $20.  While searching for lunch, a menu at one café had a cute little lunch for $58/ea.  No, we didn’t eat there.  After walking for more than an hour, a pleasant street worker in an orange suit sent us to where the locals eat, a little bierstube where homemade goulash is served steaming hot in big tureens with a fresh bread basket and cold beers for $30 altogether.  Perfect.  We thought we might go on a two-hour walking tour of the city which includes a cheese fondue lunch.  $280/ea. plus the cost of the fondue.  We obtained a booklet describing all 20 city tours.  The prices range from $150-600/person.  Apparently, there is very important shit to see here in Basel, Switzerland and the cheese fondue must beyond tasty!

Munster Cathedral

There is a curious mix of the ancient and the modern metropolitan.  The rathaus (town hall)

Rathaus in Basel

and the Münster Cathedral, both which overlook the city, were begun in the year 1,000 AD.  In the old town, half-timber buildings lean against one another for support and next door, one will find a modern fancy department store featuring models dressed in the latest blue jeans with holes all over them and stiletto high heels.  We rode the tram to the Christmas markets where we found pubs, cafes and hundreds of booths prettily decorated in lights, ornaments, garland, trees, wreaths boughs and mistletoe. 

Barfusserplatz Marketplace

In the background, the Music Grinder plays Christmas carols. 

Rob in the pub at the marketplace

We poked our heads into a little cubbyhole and found tables covered with red and white checked tablecloths where brats, beer, glüwein and hot chocolate were served. 

Lindy & The Music Grinder

At other booths, slabs of salmon were being smoked over open wood fires, long kebobs of pork, beef and veal were cooking on open flames and many different kinds of pastry were offered, baked right there before your eyes.  Cinnamon rolls, apfel strudel, quiche, pies, custards, cookies and cakes galore and of course, Swiss chocolates.

Suddenly, we heard loud thundering and what to our wondering eyes should appear?  A Harley parade through the marketplace!  Each driver was dressed like Santa and the Harleys were elaborately decorated.  This was an incredible sight!  The bikes thundered around town for hours and we laughed out loud!  American ingenuity!  Aaargh! 

Santa's sleigh a la USA

Santa on a Harley!  YAY!

Another Harley sleigh courtesy of the USA!

At last, completely worn out, we found our way back to the hotel.  Tomorrow, we will rent a car and we are off to Ulm where, they say, stands the biggest cathedral in the solar system (so far).